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Writer's pictureJennifer LaGarde

⭐️ Book Review: Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody by Patrick Ness & Tim Miller

Updated: Nov 9

As a transient kid, who grew up in poverty, I entered high school lacking many basic skills. Because I bounced from school to school, I missed large chunks of content and most teachers didn't have time to get to know me well enough to identify, never mind address, those growing gaps. Additionally, as a quiet kid, who rarely got into trouble, I was largely able to avoid scrutiny and managed to squeak by, falling through those oft mentioned cracks, advancing from grade to grade without necessarily mastering the prior year's learning. It wasn't until my first year of high school that I recognized this as a problem. For the first time, I was beginning to think about what my life might look like AFTER high school, something that was never talked about in my home. As new friends and teachers explored options, I began to realize that I didn't have many to choose from. While I had a strong vocabulary and liked to read, I struggled to write structurally correct sentences and... spelling?? Forget about it! I was an abysmal test taker and though never diagnosed, I'm absolutely certain I struggled with a combination of anxiety and learning challenges that, today, would have earned me extra support.


All of that said, I'm lucky. In the 10th grade a teacher came along who changed everything for me. Similarly, throughout my life, I crossed paths with librarians who consistently handed me books that made me want to keep reading. Even though, by today's standards, my grades and test scores would have landed me in the lowest percentiles, with labels such as "at risk" or "struggling," without that baggage to convince me otherwise, even back then I considered myself a reader. I carried books with me. I read the same books over and over again. I spent time in libraries perusing shelves. I made reading plans and kept journals full of reading reflections. The map of my life is dotted with people, events and books that both transformed me in meaningful ways and helped me figure out the kind of person I wanted to be.


One of those books was Douglas Adams' Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy. Although I wasn't much of a sci-fi fan in those days, (that has changed!) I was drawn to this book, and eventually the entire series, because it was just so... weird! Although I would later recognize that there were layers of satyrical meaning to Adams' whacky and absurd stories, as a weirdo myself, my heart needed books that celebrated being the odd duck. It's not so much that I felt seen in those books as much as I felt at home in them. All of which contributed to my steadfast belief that I was a reader - despite the stories being told by the data my schooling produced. Later, as a teacher and librarian myself, I was always on the look out for other weird books to connect with the readers whose weirdo hearts might need them, too.


And y'all... Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody, by Patrick Ness and Tim Miller, is a perfectly weird little book. And I love it!


Our story opens up as Zeke and his friends, Daniel and Alicia, are being given the solemn duty of serving as school hall monitors: an honor Principal Wombat assures them is NOT because all three of them just happen to be monitor lizards. While Zeke is not especially excited about this appointment, which Principal Wombat seems to think is a great honor, he soon finds himself wooed by the trappings of the office: an ill fitting sash identifying him as an official school hall monitor, the privilege of missing class to make sure other students are where they are supposed to be, and the heady authority to report those who aren't in their proper location to the principal. Things soon go awry, however, when school bully and wanna-be super villain, Pelicarnassus, challenges the three hall monitors' ability to make him do anything... including go to class. Things go from bad to worse when Pelicarnassus calls Zeke fat. Triggered, Zeke punches Pelicarnassus square in the beak.


With his new found position of hall monitor stripped from him, Zeke is forced to apologize, in front of the entire school, to a sheepish Pelicarnassus whose beak injury is so severe, apparently, he is now cradling one of his wings in a sling. Dissatisfied by Zeke's apology, Pelicarnassus vows revenge - which begins with a surprise invasion of France (the country!) which just happens to reside on Zeke's knee (because of why not?). When that fails, Pelicarnassus plots to destroy Zeke, his friends and the entire school - a plan so sinister that even his lackeys, (a pair of egrets who are both named Norman), feel the need to warn Zeke. Will Zeke and his friends prevail?? Of course they will! But the whacky pandemonium that follows is sure to delight the young readers for whom Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody was written.


To be clear, the charming kookiness of this book stands on it own as the kind of pure escapism many of us crave right now. In a world that often feels dark, Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody, is a much needed bright and silly light. But it will come as no surprise to fans of Ness's other work that nestled between all those layers of absurdity is also a story about carrying heavy things like grief, body insecurity, feeling othered and the toxicity of school cultures where adults ignore social hierarchies that often position vulnerable kids as targets for those with more power and privilege. The silliness of the plot provides a safe place for young readers to examine these ideas through the eyes of characters who are as lovable as they are relatable. I adore this kooky cast with my entire weirdo heart:


Zeke: our unlikely hero; a peach throated monitor lizard whose mom's crippling grief (in the form of an ever present black dog) prevents her from caring for herself or for Zeke, leaving him with responsibilities he is far too young to shoulder. Zeke is thoughtful, kind, resolute and completely unaware of how strong he is.


Daniel: Zeke's chronically underestimated best friend; A clouded monitor lizard, Daniel "was chaos in a teeny-tiny package, full of laughter and good cheer, but also really, really good at being a friend if you gave him half a chance." Maybe it's because I taught so many kids like him, but I'm unabashedly #TeamDaniel.


Alicia: the third member of our lizard trio; a wise, beyond her years, clouded monitor who is always ready to stand up for her friends, but who also knows when it's time to call in reinforcements. I found Alicia's earnest form of friendship both moving and aspirational.


Miel: a visually impaired hawk and defacto member of the bird clique. ("birds held themselves above most of the rest of the school. And yes, that was literal. They could fly, and they never let anyone forget it.") New to the the school, Miel defies school norms, which place lizards at the bottom of the school food chain, in order to form independent opinions about Zeke, his friends and the dreaded Pelicarnassus.


Even Pelicarnassus and The Normans are beguiling in their cartoonish villainy.


Maybe it's the serious (and often depressing) times we're living in, but my heart needed this earnest and utterly preposterous book. Punctuated by Tim Miller's goofy and expressive illustrations, Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody offers kids an example of a world where friendship proves stronger than bullies, the desire to help others galvanizes community and despite all odds, the lovable weirdos prevail. Just as Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy  proved to be one of those books that I returned to often, I'm convinced that Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody is precisely the kind of story that young readers will want to read over and over again. What's more, as someone whose reading identity was shaped, in large part, by the place my heart found in books just like this, I am excited for all the little weirdos (like me!) out there for whom Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody will help to solidify their belief in themselves as readers.


Some other things I loved about this book...


  • Although not the focus of my review, I adore the way that Ness and Miller help young readers navigate grief. I was deeply moved by Zeke's mom's story.

  • While I loved the print version, the audiobook (narrated by Robert G. Slade) is a pure delight!

  • No spoilers, but y'all... I've read the chapter about Ms Pfister more times than I care to count. I have had my fair share of run-ins with far too many ponies!

  • Take off the book jacket, y'all... because the case cover of this one is a gift just waiting to be discovered.

  • I recently learned that Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody is the first of a planned series. I can't wait for book two!


 

ISBN: 9781536235937

Publisher: Walker Books Us

Publication Date: September 2024

Audience: Zeke and his friends are in the 6th grade, but I think readers in grades 4+ will adore this book.


⭐️ BONUS CONTENT:

Y'all! I can hardly believe it, but Patrick Ness will be joining me (and all of you!) for this month's Bookelicious Middle Grade Book Club on 11/12/24! Registration for this event is FREE and there will be a recording, so reserve your spot today! That said, every month I create additional resources, (related to our book club pick) for participants. It's my hope that these resources will prove helpful to educators who spend their days connecting readers to the stories their hearts need most. While I'm still holding a few goodies up my sleeve, here's a preview of the Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody related resources that I will share during book club in November.


COLORING SHEET:

First, y'all know that I love creating coloring sheets to go along with the books I review, but it's tricky when those books are illustrated. Not only can my offerings not compete with the original illustrations, but one of the things I love most about Miller's illustrations is that they feel attainable for kids. I can imagine little Jennifer tracing and copying Miller's renderings of Zeke and the gang into my own notebooks as a kid. With that in mind, the coloring sheet for Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody has gone through MANY iterations, but I finally landed on something that allows kids to imagine what happens to Zeke next. I love the way Ness and Miller ended this book, both because it's heart filling AND because it gives readers the chance to make some predictions. That said, I've been thinking a lot lately about the ways that reading (and coloring!) can serve as stress reducers during a time when so many of us (kids included!) are experiencing a great deal of stress. In my heart of hearts, I'd like to think that this resource might entice colorers to pick up Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody, while also giving those readers who have already fallen in love with it, a fun way to stay connected to the story, but... it's fine if readers (of all ages!) just have fun coloring it, too. You can access the free download here.



CONNECTIONS:

Next up, I also created a Connections style puzzle to go along with Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody! As someone who plays the NYT Connections puzzle every day, I have the most fun creating these, y'all! I wrote about the process for creating book related Connections here. The post also includes a planning worksheet for kiddos to help them with the process of creating their own book related Connections puzzles. That said, a link to the puzzle for Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody, along with the answer key, can be found here.



DISCOUNT CODE:

Finally, please enjoy a special discount of 20% off Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody  (or other books of your choice) by visiting Bookelicious and using the code JENNIFERLAGARDE. Note: I do not make any money when you purchase books from Bookelicious, but I am delighted that you get to save some by using my discount code! HOWEVER, I would be remiss if I didn't mention that buying books from Bookelicious is the way we keep events (like our Middle Grade Book Club) free while also supporting the authors and illustrators who join us each month, so... I hope you'll think of your book purchases from Bookelicous as supporting a good cause!


Happy Reading!

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